I grew up under the wing of a grandmother with an indomitable spirit and a deep, rich understanding of the Catholic faith. She was also an inventive cook, which meant that we never really knew what to expect until the food ended up on our plates. Sometimes it was delicious, sometimes it was awful.
Despite the roll of the dice in terms of edibility, there were always two constants at dinner: We took turns saying grace before meals, and we ate together at the table as a family. Sometimes that backfired too, and perhaps grace is what prevented some of the adults at the table from killing each other over the years.
While I developed the habit of saying grace in my youth, it wasn’t until I was well-into adulthood that I started to appreciate what grace actually meant to me.
I was never really satisfied with the usual sentiments associated with the prayers we offer up at most meals. Most of the time they fall along the lines of “giving thanks for the nourishment for our bodies” or “thanking God for His provision”, and they’re usually said with the enthusiasm of a comatose tuna fish.
While those things are important, and God appreciates our gratitude, I never really paid attention to one key part of getting food to the table: Something had to suffer and die so that we can live.
Think about it for a second. Almost everything that we eat comes from something that was alive before it was destroyed to become food. Sometimes the only reason things are allowed to live in the first place is to become food for us. The same could be said of our lives in general too, in addition to what we eat. Just think about of how much suffering goes into keeping us around for another day.
Just because we don’t see or hear the suffering associated with all of that doesn’t mean that suffering didn’t take place. Creation never suffered until we screwed it up to begin with, and that suffering has only increased with humanity’s insatiable desire to be fruitful, multiply, eat, drink and be merry.
I was out delivering food on an awful, stormy morning a couple of years ago. I was driving through a busy intersection in the midst of a torrential downpour, and I accidentally ran over a kitten that was crossing the road.
Normally, something like that would bother me a for little bit, but I’d eventually just chalk it up to nature doing its thing and then forget about it. Yet, this got to me more than usual, and I was legitimately grieved. It left a lingering wound on my spirit. I actually wrote a song and made a cheesy video about it as a way to say I’m sorry.
One thing that really bothered me was that it wouldn’t have happened if I wasn’t on the way to a sandwich shop to pick up lunch for a customer. The only reason I was working that day to begin with was for some extra cash so I could eat and drink with my buddies later on. To take things further, this wouldn’t have happened if the customer didn’t get hungry for a beef sandwich and place the order in the first place.
Yes, I know, I’m over-thinking this, but this is exactly the kind of thing that God sends our way to soften and grow our hearts. It also illustrates how something has to die so that we can live and have life abundantly. That’s just the reality of life as we know it in this broken world that we temporarily call our home. The problem is that death and destruction are so prevalent and fundamentally-ingrained into our collective human psyche that we become utterly desensitized to it.
Saying grace brings us back to that reality for a brief moment.
It brings us back to appreciating how much God values us over everything else that He created. While life on earth is indeed ours to manage on God’s behalf, we’ve managed to screw that up in spectacular fashion, and predictably-so. Our fallen state requires that something has to suffer so that we don’t. Everything that we need to destroy in order to live is connected to that in one way or another.
Not only do our sins require a sacrifice to join us with God properly, but they also require sacrifices to keep us alive until we’re joined with God perfectly. Acknowledging the suffering that we cause, simply by our very existence, is intended to lead us into a deeper understanding and appreciation of God’s grace and indescribable love for each one of us.
The next time you say grace, take a moment to be mindful of the extraordinary value that you have to God and to those who are in your life. So much so that God is willing to sacrifice part of creation that He loves because He loves you more. Let that sink in, and allow it to break your heart open.
You’ll be amazed by where that leads.
I wrote Kitten Lullaby, and made that cheesy video, as a way to process all of this in the days that followed that unfortunate drive in the storm. Let it be a prayer of gratitude when you need a reminder of how much value your life has in the eyes of God.